Category: Living the Life

I Think This Is The New Normal

Published by dee on September 10, 2010

I’ve been trying to put more effort into writing here lately, but this week sort of slipped away from me. After getting back from our awesome weekend at the lake, we had to jump right back in to real life. Real life isn’t nearly as much fun.

On top of raging allergies (for 3 of the 4 of us) it has been a busy, busy, week full of things that I just didn’t want to do. One of those things included sitting at the eyeglasses store with a restless 5-year-old for over an hour waiting for them to replace the frames that have broken a million and one times now. They finally replaced them free of charge, though they didn’t have the exact same frames available. They did have a similar style that his lenses would fit in, but black instead of brown. At least the lenses seem to stay in these…so far.

Then there were more problems at school for Zach, which I’ve been asked to discuss with his teacher next week. There’s the fight to get homework done every night, the baths, the bedtime routine. It all just wears me out. Not to mention the fact that Miss Evie seems to have found her attitude all of a sudden and it isn’t a pleasant one.

On Thursday, Zach was supposed to have his first soccer practice and he was SO excited. So excited that when he found out it was canceled due to rain, he dropped to the floor and cried. Poor kid. I felt really bad for him, but I guess he’ll be extra excited when he gets to have TWO practices next week.

The canceled practice was a bit of a blessing for me, because it allowed me to get the kids settled down a little earlier for bed and I got to actually sit and watch the Saints game with Hubby while simultaneously editing photos and crocheting. Nothing like multi-tasking! I’m trying to get a head start on holiday projects this year and the cooler temperatures have really gotten me in the mood to play with some yarn. I’ve done a lot of knitting in the last few years, but for some reason I’ve been in the mood to pull out the crochet hooks lately. One project down – lots to go.

This weekend Hubby’s on call for work so we’ll be sticking close to home. There’s lots of cleaning to be done, the pool at mom’s house to get packed away for another year, and hopefully some time for some creative projects and relaxing. If I’m lucky I might even get a good run in. Next week will be another busy one, so I want to enjoy the weekend as much as possible.

And with that, I’ll post some happy weekend at the lake pictures.

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Blue Skies Ahead

Published by dee on September 3, 2010

This picture is all kinds of wrong technically, but I absolutely love it. It’s not often I’m able to capture my three favorite people all together and smiling.

This week has been a little rough. We’ve been really busy every night, throwing off our regular routines. There has been some yucky stuff going on at school with Zach that has had me really upset (and him) but hopefully we’re getting that sorted out. Evie has had some of the worst “terrible twos” behavior that we’ve seen yet (though I think she is cutting more molars which may be part of the problem). The A/C in my car is out (again) and our garage door (the one that was still working) broke (literally broke into two pieces) as we were backing out of the driveway.

I hit a real low spot about mid-way through the week and just felt completely defeated. As I sunk into my bed that night, I prayed for guidance and strength. Coincidence or not, as I drove to work the next morning I saw a rainbow ahead of me. On my way home I saw another one. And this morning? Another one. Rainbows seem to be all around me all of a sudden, but maybe I’m just opening my eyes a bit more. Today I feel calm and things are definitely looking up.

This weekend we’re headed to the lake to spend time with family. I’m looking forward to finally having some time to relax and forget about the craziness for a few days. The kids can’t wait to go out on Grandpa’s boat and to go fishing. I can’t wait to sleep past 6:00 a.m.

To those of you in the U.S., enjoy your Labor Day weekend!

P.S. Have you checked out #dofunstuff yet? You really should!

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Discontent

Published by dee on August 26, 2010

A couple days ago I was scanning my Facebook feed and noticed a link to a post titled Texting Leads to Discontent. I thought it sounded interesting, so I clicked through to read more. It hits on a topic that is often discussed regarding texting and our constant need to be connected to others, but the way it was put really struck a nerve for me:

“I looked around the room and there were all my friends… texting other people, and I thought, ‘so this is what it looks like’.”

She asked, “What WHAT looks like?”

“DISCONTENT,” he replied. “There we were having our own get together and everyone was looking for a better place to be, a different party.”

That thought has really stuck with me since I read it. I’ve played it over and over again in my mind. I’m not one to spend a lot of time texting, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my iphone reading through my Twitter stream or commenting on my friends’ Facebook posts. Does it mean I’m not content in that moment? Not necessarily, but maybe sometimes it does. Maybe I am searching for something more interesting, something new to grab my attention, a way to escape the mundane moments.

Even before reading this, I’ve been backing away from the social media sites I used to obsess over. My hubby has commented that he misses my Twitter updates throughout the day. I wonder how many of those nearly 900 Twitter followers actually care about my infrequent updates? My guess is that I’m not missed, at least not by many.

Lately, I find that when I’m engrossed in the online world, I am less content with my everyday life. I love the internet for what it is – an amazing source of information, a way to keep up with friends and family across the country, and an opportunity to express myself creatively when I choose to. There’s a bad side to all of that too. I compare myself to others. I get jealous of others because they are smarter, prettier, have a better camera, have a better house…and on and on. I hate myself for being so petty about it, but at the same time, I can’t stop feeling that way.

Maybe I am looking for a better place to be, a different party.

Sometimes I think about what life was like nine years ago, shortly after my husband and I had started dating. I was perfectly content to curl up in his arms and watch TV or movies for hours at a time. There was no need to check my phone. There was no web site to repeatedly update. Of course, there were no children to distract us either. There really were no distractions at all. It was just the two of us together.

Nine years later, it is nearly torture for me to sit through an entire movie without doing something else at the same time. I’m constantly checking my phone or have my laptop in my lap. If not, I’ve got yarn and knitting needles to keep my hands busy. If I’m not doing something else, I can’t focus on the movie because my mind is shooting off in a million directions, thinking of other things. Always moving, always thinking, always letting the good moments pass me by.

Maybe this is what discontent looks like.

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Scattered

Published by dee on August 19, 2010

My brain is not working so well these days. It seems it is constantly running in a million directions and I can’t seem to concentrate on any one thing. I have a running list of to-do items flowing through my brain, yet can’t seem to accomplish any of them.

I’m forgetting important things, ignoring things that I just don’t have the energy to deal with, yelling at my kids when they just want some attention because I just can’t take one more thing.

I drove past the turn to Zach’s school three times in one day because my mind was wandering.

I did manage to make sure Zach had clean school clothes and helped him complete his homework every night this week, so that’s something.

For the last two weeks I’ve been unbelievably tired. I’m blaming it on allergies/sinuses/stress, but there has been more than one night when I’ve put myself to bed just after the kids are tucked in. Yet, I still can’t seem to get enough sleep. Then there’s the headaches, which I haven’t had in years. They come nearly every day.

I’m making lists – trying to get back on track. I bought a new notebook and pens to motivate myself at work. (Funny how a new pen can change my mood) I pulled out my Busy Body Book that I haven’t used since February to motivate myself at home. I’m hoping that new to-do lists and schedules will help keep me on track a bit.

I haven’t really been running since Race for the Cure. I got a couple of runs in this week, but can’t seem to find the motivation I need. There’s the tiredness, and then I found a strange bump on the top of my foot that (maybe) explains the dull pain I’ve been having for quite a while. I miss it, but I can’t seem to motivate myself to get out of bed in the mornings. I should have gotten up to run today, but I chose the extra hour of sleep instead.

I know part of it is just the change in routine. We’re all adjusting to a new schedule with Zach starting school. Plus, whether I like it or not, I’m pretty sure the stress of him starting school is still causing a bit of an emotional drain on me.

There’s just a lot going on and I would really like for it all to just stop, so I can get organized, rest, and catch up. I’m tired of my head and my life feeling so scattered.

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Race For The Cure

Published by dee on August 9, 2010

Sunday morning I crawled out of bed at 5:45 a.m. I was both excited and nervous knowing that in two hours I would be running my first 5K run at the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. I was pretty sure I could force myself to run the entire 3.1 miles on my treadmill in my 70 degree basement, but I didn’t train outdoors and I was worried about the heat and humidity combination. However, I took a peek at my pledge page just before I went to bed Saturday night and this is what I saw:

I have some incredible friends and family members. You guys not only doubled, but tripled my fund raising goal! I thought I would be lucky to hit $160, but never in my wildest dreams did I think I would see the balance rise to nearly $500! I wasn’t about to let you guys down.

My mom and my niece Caitlin got up early to cheer me on (and give me a ride) and I was glad to have them there. My nerves started getting the best of me just shortly before the race started. I decided to hit the port-a-potty line and by the time I got out had only about five minutes until start time.

When I got to the starting line, quite a few people had already started walking, but I waited for the official start to take off. The first thing I realized was that I should have trained for hills. Funny how it seems a whole lot more hilly when you’re on your feet than when you’re in a car!

I got a pretty good start, but tired out a lot faster than I thought I would. I blame it on the combination of the hills and the sun beating down on me. I had to stop and walk much sooner than I wanted to, but I knew if I didn’t I’d never make it the whole way. I ended up walking most of the uphills and running as much as I could on the downhills and flat areas.

I was getting pretty worn out by the time I got near the end, but I was determined to finish it out running. As I turned the last corner I took a short walk break, then ran toward the finish line. I finished at 45 minutes, 56 seconds, which was much better than I was expecting.

Overall it was a great experience and one I definitely plan to do again. Next year I’m going to raise the bar and increase my fund raising goal. I may even try to run the timed race next year. I’m going to start training next week. I see a lot of hills in my future!

To all of you who donated, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. It really means a lot that you would donate to a cause that is so important to me, and more importantly, that you believe in me.

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Racing For the Cure

Published by dee on August 5, 2010

On Sunday, August 8th, I am running in Kansas City’s Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. Those of you who know me well know that I am not a runner. Not at all. In fact, if you told my high school volleyball coach that I was about to run a 5K, I’m sure she would burst out laughing. I nearly died every time we had to run during practices and I really haven’t made an effort to try again until this year.

I set out in January of 2010 with one goal – to run the Komen Race for the Cure. I’ve wanted to participate for years but have never committed to it for one reason or another. I always thought I would be walking it, but for some reason I decided I wanted to run it. I started training in the Spring, giving myself plenty of time (so I thought) to be ready for a 5K by August. I had a few setbacks along the way, but I’ve run more miles this year than I ever have in my life.

So why am I doing all this? The Susan G. Komen Foundation is something I believe in. I don’t know a single person in my life who hasn’t been touched by breast cancer. Whether it be your own mother, grandmother, wife, aunt, cousin, niece, daughter, co-worker, friend, or friend-of-a-friend, everyone has had someone in their life that has dealt with this disease. The best way to combat it at this point is early detection. There are amazing people out there that are working toward a cure every day, but until we find it we must rely on early detection. Funds raised from Race for the Cure are used to provide education, screening and treatment services for women in the Kansas City area.

By running in Race for the Cure, I feel like I’m doing my part to help provide these important services. There aremany women in my life that have survived breast cancer, thanks to the treatments that are now available. Wouldn’t it be great to know that there was a cure out there? I would love to see it happen in my lifetime and we get closer and closer every day. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to know that our daughters and granddaughters would not have to live with the threat of this disease?

As of today, I am 62% of the way to my fund raising goal of $160. I really want to meet that goal, and even surpass it if possible. Nothing will motivate me more to run than knowing that I am making a difference. Will you help me make a difference? Can you donate $5, $10, $20? Even a little bit will help me get closer to my goal.

If you’d like to donate online, please click the following link and fill in all of your information: Donate to Race For The Cure

If you would like to donate, but would prefer to write a check or pay in cash, please leave a comment with your e-mail address and I’ll get the proper information to you.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading this and for any donations you may send. I couldn’t do this without the support of my friends and family. I’m so lucky to have all of you in my life.

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