Category: Kids & Parenting

Change of Pace

Published by dee on February 8, 2013

As of today, I am officially one week into my new part-time schedule. This is going to take some adjustment time for sure. For now, I am working 3 hours in the office Monday through Friday, picking up the two younger kids, then working another 2.5-3 hours at home after that. It is a bit of an odd schedule, but works out the best as far as cutting day care costs down. This way, Evie is still able to go to preschool every day. She just comes home in the afternoon instead of staying and taking a nap at school.

The schedule, for me, feels a little chaotic. In time we will figure out a good routine, but for now it is a bit crazy. I leave work at 12:15, pick Evie up, pick Caleb up, then rush home to get Caleb down for a nap, scarf down my lunch, and get Evie settled in so that I can sit and work. The kids are doing pretty good with it, although Evie is pushing my buttons a bit. I think that will settle in time too, as she figures out what she will be able to get away with. The part I hate is that I have to wake Caleb up from his nap every day to go pick Zach up from school. It is so nice for Zach to be able to be home earlier and not have to go to the after school program though.

I’m finding that there are good and bad things about the new schedule. I LOVE being home in the afternoons. I love that I can throw in a load of laundry mid-day and not be waiting up at midnight for a load of diapers to dry for the next day. I love that I can take my laptop outside and work while the kids play on a sunny day. I love that our evenings don’t feel so rushed. I am also responsible for dinner prep now (it has been hubby’s job for the last several years) which is both good and bad. I’m not a fan of cooking, but I do like that I can introduce a better variety of meals now.

There are things I miss about being at work full-time too. Primarily, the paycheck! I miss having my lunch hour to run errands. I miss getting to actually eat my lunch without sharing. I miss lunches with my mom, especially when I didn’t get to take her our for her birthday this week. I miss zoning out in my office with my music cranked up in my headphones while I work.

I am learning a few things too. I have to really schedule and prepare for the work I am taking home every day. Some things are easier to do from home than others. Also, my kids eat A LOT. I was not prepared for the amount of snacking that they seem to think they need to do. Evie, in particular, is constantly wanting something to eat. I don’t know if it is just because she is home and it is available, or if the girl has been starving at school all this time. Zach also comes home wanting food immediately. I would pack them bigger lunches, but then they just tell me they don’t have time to eat it all. So, snacks it is. I apparently need to do some stocking up.

It feels a bit challenging as we adjust to this change, but I really think it will be good for our family in so many ways. It still feels really weird to me to be home during the day, but in a good way.

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Caleb – 7 Months

Published by dee on October 10, 2012

Dear Caleb,

They say that the last child is forgotten in photos, that their life as a child is not documented as the older children’s are. For you, this is certainly not true. Rarely does a day go by that I don’t snap a photo of you. I’m not sure whether to blame it on my increased love of photography or the fact that my iphone’s camera makes it so easy to pick up and snap those everyday moments, but I do know I treasure each and every photo.

Where I do feel I have failed you, my third (and last) child, is documenting your life in words. While I will never truly consider myself a writer, the most precious words I have ever written are those documenting the lives of my children. Sadly, I find it difficult to find the time to sit down and type the words out that I want to say so often. As you pass each new milestone, I try to reach back into my memory to compare you to when your brother and sister passed the same milestones and my memory fails me. To find my memories, I go back to the words I have written, and only then do I remember the details that are growing fuzzy. This is why I am so sad that I have not recorded the same memories for you.

You are seven months old, quickly coming up on eight, and you are the happiest baby I have ever had the opportunity to know. You flash your beautiful smile around to everyone you meet and almost always receive a smile in return. It is so rare to see you unhappy, that when you cry I know something must really be wrong. The last couple of weeks have been a little rough as you have been working on cutting some teeth, and then got a nasty cold on top of that. The last couple of days have seen great improvement though, and your joyful personality has been shining back through.

Developmentally, you are right on track. I have to watch your hands as you will grab anything within your reach. You can sit up on your own now, which makes it much easier to play with all of the toys we still have around from when Zach and Evie were babies. You have the fastest army crawl I think I’ve ever seen and are on the verge of full-on crawling (as soon as you figure out how to not tip forward). I keep thinking you are going to take off on your knees any day, but you are taking your time. That’s okay though, you move fast enough as it is. I already have to remind myself that I can’t leave you sleeping on the bed when I take my showers anymore. I may have to invest in a pack ‘n’ play for every room of the house to keep you contained.

You have started saying a few sounds that resemble words. The first clear repetitive sound was “da-da” (even though I’ll try to keep denying it). I’ve caught a “mama” a few times, and potentially an “ee-ee” here and there. Other sounds are still pretty random, but I have no doubt that you’ll be spouting off all kinds of stuff soon.

You have cut four teeth now, two on bottom and two on top. I’m glad they are coming in because you LOVE to eat. You seem to be quite bored with the mushy baby food though and would really like to eat what the rest of the family is eating most of the time. You love to feed yourself, so I’ve been trying to find soft veggies and fruits that you can pick up on your own. In the last week or so you’ve started fighting for the spoon too, but I’m not sure I’m quite ready for that mess yet!

The one thing you are doing slower than your siblings is using a sippy cup. It isn’t that you can’t or don’t want to use the cup, its that you don’t seem to keep down any liquid other than milk so I’m not sure what to put in the cup. You are still breastfeeding like a champ, but I can barely seem to pump enough milk for your bottles at day care so there isn’t any extra to try in the cup. I’m hoping this issue resolves itself as your reflux lessens, but for now, water and/or juice are not really an option.

I think your absolute favorite time of day is bath time. You seem to know what is coming when I undress you and as soon as I start walking toward the bathroom you start squealing and laughing. Your brother and sister fight nearly every night over who gets to take a bath with you. I think they secretly just enjoy getting to have you all to themselves for a few minutes. You love to splash in the water and play with the bath toys. I think you also love the slippery surface. You flip yourself back and forth from back to tummy, no matter how many times I try to keep you from doing it. You have no fear of the water and love to put your head and/or hands under the stream when the tub is filling.

As infectious as your smiles are, your laughter is even more so. You seem to have a great sense of humor already, and laugh often at the silliest things. You tease your daddy and giggle as you sit in his lap. Your brother and sister can crack you up in an instant. You absolutely love all of our animals and laugh as you put them through your very own brand of torture. (Fortunately, they don’t seem to mind losing clumps of fur too much.) My favorite though, is when I get you right on your best tickle spot – just under your neck, along the collar bone. It was a little tickle there that resulted in your first belly laugh, and I’ll never forget it.

My sweet baby, you are so surrounded by love. Your brother and sister absolutely adore you. Your cousins just cannot get enough of you. Your grandparents, aunts, and uncles love you so much. You have so many extended family members thinking of you, praying for you, and loving you from afar. As for your dad and I? Words can not possibly describe how much love we have for you. My hope is that you always feel that love as you grow and depend on it when things get hard and you need an extra little push in life.

These letters to you may be few and far between. I may not be able to keep up with every milestone or every birthday. Even if I never write another one, I wanted to at least get this down, to remember this time in our fast-paced lives. I hope that somehow, somewhere, this letter survives and that you have the chance to read it someday. When you do read it, I want you to know what an unexpected blessing you are in our lives. I can’t imagine a world without you in it.

Love always,
Mama

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The End of Summer

Published by dee on September 19, 2012

I had to actually scroll back a couple pages to see when the last time I actually wrote something was – two months ago. I honestly have no idea how time moves so fast. I used to sit around wishing for the weekends to come and the weekdays would seem so long. Now I wish even the weekdays would slow down.

So, summer ended and the school year began. Zach is in 2nd grade this year and so far things are going really well. He has a male teacher, which I was a little worried about because he seems to have issues with male authority figures. He also happens to have a young female student teacher who will be with his class the entire year, so I think that is adding a buffer that has been very good for him. I haven’t heard any complaints so far, other than the basic “I don’t want to go to school because I want to stay home and watch TV” type of complaints.

Evie started preschool this year. She was very much ready for this change, even though I worried unnecessarily about the transition. She was slightly hesitant the first day when I dropped her off, but on the second day she ran off to play without even telling my good-bye. She is really enjoying it so far, although she did tell me that I take too long to come back.

Summer went by so fast that we didn’t get to do a lot of the fun things we had planned, but we did squeeze in a little more fun. We finally made it to the Missouri State Fair this year and the kids had a blast! They loved riding all of the rides and were so sad when it was time to leave.

We also made our yearly trip to the lake over Labor Day weekend. It was Caleb’s first trip to the lake with us and while he wasn’t a fan of his life jacket, he did seem to enjoy the boat rides and swimming in the lake. It rained the first day we were there, leaving the water quite chilly, but he didn’t seem to mind. He was having way too much fun splashing to care!

Caleb is growing and changing so fast. I’ll save the details for another post (coming soon! I promise!), but he has basically gone from sweet little baby who eats and sleeps to semi-mobile baby who wants to play, play, play! He does not want to sit still for any reason.

Life is moving to fast for me to sit back and reflect much these days. I’ve had some fantastic photo shoots with some beautiful families. I love photography more and more every day. Sadly, my own photos are sitting on my computer waiting to receive some love because I haven’t had the time to sort them the last couple months. I’m weeks behind on laundry and housework, but I’m spending every spare moment I have snuggling on my last baby before I blink my eyes and he is grown.

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Summer

Published by dee on July 2, 2012

Today kind of feels like the first day of summer for our family. Summer school is finally done for Zach. Evie and Caleb are done with day care for a while. For the first time ever, my kids actually get to know what it feels like to have a summer off and get to stay home. The idea of putting all three kids in full time day care for the summer nearly gave me a heart attack, so my awesome sister agreed to keep the kids for the rest of the summer. My in-laws are coming up to cover about a week and a half while my sister has other obligations, so that only leaves about a week at the end of the summer for us to figure out.

I’m not even sure when this became such a big deal to me. I mean, sure, it saves me some money in day care costs, but it isn’t just that. I’m genuinely excited that my kids get to be at home. They can sleep in, watch tv, play, and just enjoy being kids – all of the things I wish I could go back and do again. The only hard part is that I don’t get to be there to enjoy it with them. I find myself wishing, yet again, that I would have followed my own plan and continued to pursue becoming a school guidance counselor (I could never be a teacher!) so that I could have summers off too. I didn’t realize what I was giving up when I let my life change course.

I shouldn’t let myself do it, but I keep finding myself daydreaming about the things I could do with the kids if only I were home with them during the week. We can only cram so much into a weekend and I feel like they deserve so much more than I can give. Plus, splitting my time between 3 kids is way harder than splitting it between 2, especially when 1 of the 3 demands my attention the majority of the time. I feel like the older kids are really missing out right now and it just plain sucks.

In order to combat my feelings of inadequacy, we came up with a summer bucket list of sorts of all the fun family activities we want to do…that I now have to also cram into the already full weekends. Instead of taking the time to clean my house, do laundry, and grocery shop on the weekends, I’m taking time out to be with my kids and do something fun with them. I need it just as much as they do. So if you come to my house and can’t walk through the living room? I’m sorry. We’re going to be too busy applying sunscreen, playing in the water, going camping, picnicking, having water balloon fights, and hanging out at the lake to clean it up.

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Seven

Published by dee on June 26, 2012

Zach turns seven today and for some reason I am a mopey mess of emotions about it. My BABY is SEVEN! I’m blaming this crazy emotional state of mine on the residual hormone changes from birthing my last baby (who is already 4 months old!) and the fact that said baby is practically a little mini-me of Zach. The personalities are different, but my two boys look so very much alike that it is hard to look at Caleb and not think about sitting and holding Zach as an infant. Looking at the two of them just reinforces how quickly it all goes by. He may be turning seven today, but I’m pretty sure when I blink my eyes he’ll be 18 and moving away from home. Although, he has assured me that when he moves out he’ll just buy the house next to mine or maybe across the street so he can still come visit a lot. I suppose I can live with that.

Since his party isn’t until Saturday and Daddy won’t be home tonight, we decided to celebrate a little bit last night. We took him out for the dinner of his choice (which ended up being McDonald’s), had ice cream for dessert, and then let him open his birthday gifts from the family.

I’d say he is pretty happy with his gifts. He would have been even happier if I would have let him stay up all night and finish building his new Legos, but even 7-year-olds need their sleep.

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In A Blink

Published by dee on May 24, 2012

I keep finding myself thinking back to when Zach was a baby. Looking back now, it seems like life was so simple then. My world completely revolved around him. There were no other distractions. There was plenty of time to sit and cuddle and get totally lost in his sweet little baby face.

With Caleb being baby number three, I feel like I so rarely get that time to just sit and enjoy his babyness. I feel like I blinked my eyes and BOOM! He’s three months old already. He’s growing and changing so fast.

The mommy guilt? Oh man, is it ever setting in. While I’m trying to savor every minute I can with Caleb, I feel like I’m totally ignoring the other two kids. I see the behaviors coming out and the begging for attention. It is impossible with the limited time we have together at home to give everyone all of the attention they need. The hardest part is when I am feeding the baby and cannot help the other two with what they are needing in that moment. Not to mention the husband who has been feeling totally neglected since the baby arrived.

On top of trying to juggle the new baby while sticking as close as possible to our normal routine, I’m trying to get my little photography business rolling again. Just as it was gaining momentum I had to take a break (due to being massively pregnant)…that turned into about 6 months. Winter would have been slow anyway, but not taking on clients for 6 months was kind of a killer. What that time did give me though, was a lot of time to think through what I am doing and make some changes. I’m now getting a bit of a do-over, or fresh start, and hope to make things better this time around. (Speaking of which, have you seen my gorgeous new logo?) This all takes time though, so I find myself having to choose between the business I want to grow, my family, and sleep. Guess which one loses out?

If you guessed sleep, you would be correct. Fortunately, once I do get to bed I can actually sleep. I just don’t get enough hours in. Caleb is still sleeping through the night, which is a true blessing. He usually snoozes off and on after about 8:00, zonks out completely around 10:00 or 11:00, and then sleeps solid until at least 6:00, sometimes later. Then he nurses and goes right back to sleep. I can deal with that. It does make it hard for me to get up though, because after that 6am nursing session I like to snuggle in bed with him instead of getting up and starting my day.

So, let’s get back to why I originally started this blog post and talk about how awesome my sweet baby Caleb is, shall we?

Caleb turned 3 months old on Saturday and celebrated this amazing feat by rolling over for the first time. He had been working on it for several days with no success. Saturday night he was a little restless so I put him down in the floor on a blanket and sat down to play with him for a bit. He kept trying to twist his body and finally, after several attempts, he made it all the way over from his back to his tummy. After I helped get his arm out from underneath him, he was quite proud of himself and had a huge smile on his face. I cheered and even clapped for him until I realized that I could no longer leave him on the bed by himself.

He has also discovered that he has hands and feet that he can control. He found his hands a while ago, but the feet are a pretty new discovery. Whenever he sits up in the Bumbo or another chair, he will stick his feet up in the air and stare as he wiggles them around.

Over the last couple of days he has also discovered that he has a thumb that moves independently from the rest of his hand. And that he can stick said thumb in his mouth and suck on it. He has taken a pacifier from day one, but suddenly he is spitting it out in favor of the thumb. I’ve never had a thumb sucker before and I’m not sure whether I want to try to stop it now or have to deal with breaking the habit later. He’s pretty intent on having it in his mouth right now. He has sucked that thumb so much today that the tip of it is bright red. I guess he had to throw something new at me though, seeing as he’s nearly perfect in every other way.

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