Skip to content

Tag: social distancing

Day 59

We’re on day 59 of social distancing – essentially two months at home. Our family started a couple days before the official orders came down. We didn’t have any plans really, and with all the uncertainty it seemed best to stay in for the weekend. Things are starting to open up again, slowly, and with restrictions. Some people are ready to just get out there and get back to regular life, but I’m feeling a little more reserved about it – not quite ready to jump back in.

Everything feels different right now. After two months of being home, slowing down, no rushed schedules, no running here and there, and only a very few obligations that require marking things on a calendar, I’m wondering what it will feel like to return to that life. I don’t miss the busy, the packed calendars, the late nights after practices and activities. But then I glance at the calendar and see that Caleb’s soccer tournament should have been this weekend and Evie’s volleyball season should be wrapping up and I am sad for their missed opportunities. I am sad that they are missing the end of their first year at their new schools. They are missing the fun part after working hard all year. There are no yearbook signing parties, no field days, no celebrations for a job well done. It will just be over.

The coming of summer, which normally is an exciting and welcome change every year, seems so anticlimatic this year. Camps the kids were looking forward to will most likely be cancelled, or at the very least be a very different experience than they were expecting. Staying home from school doesn’t seem very exciting as we’ve been doing that already. Travel plans are questionable as we wait to see where things stand in the world.

I feel myself being a little more moody lately, going up and down from day to day. Some days I’m all in and ready to make the best of the situation, and other days I just want to sit and get lost in netflix and video games and ignore the rest of the world. Once I get myself into a project or my work I’m usually good, it just takes a lot of effort to get going. My sense of motivation for the things I *should* be doing is really lacking most days. I’m sure the lack of urgency is a big factor there. There is no deadline. I don’t have a problem completing work tasks or even mowing the yard, but I can look at a sink full of dishes for two days before I decide to actually do something about it. I mean, no one is coming over to see how dirty my kitchen is anyway.

In all of this, I do find myself being so very thankful for the internet and all the amazing ways we have to communicate. I can’t imagine how much more isolated and alone we would all be feeling without the ability to connect to our people online. Between gaming, social media, video chats, sharing photos, streaming church services, and even classroom conference calls, we are all able to connect to the people and the things that are most important to us. Those are the things that are getting us through this strange time right now. As much as I enjoy being alone and having time to myself, I do have to say that I’m realizing just how important that human connection truly is.

1 Comment

Quarantine Confessions

I’m sure by now we are all realizing life is a little different these days. Maybe some of you are like me and have found yourself doing things that you never imagined you would do. TikTok anyone?!?  Maybe you are even a little bit embarrassed about those things. Well, for the sake of solidarity, I’m going to share a list of things I’ve caught myself doing out of sheer boredom during this social distancing quarantine that I most likely would have never done otherwise.

  • I streamed the entire five seasons of Awkward in less than 2 weeks – often staying up until 2 a.m. or later to get in just *one more* episode.
  • After finishing Awkward, I started in on Vampire Diaries with the same late night streaming behavior. It is taking a little longer – I’m only on season 4, but Evie has now caught up with me so we are watching the rest of it together.
  • I insisted that my husband let me mow the lawn so I could count it as exercise even though he offered to do it instead. I also maybe told him not to buy the new deck he needs for the riding mower so I have to keep push mowing.
  • I’ve spent way too much money online shopping – mostly on clothing of the athleisure variety. I mean, if I’m gonna run and work out I have to look cute, right? Now to get back to those workouts….
  • I got sucked into TikTok watching videos of my nieces and then found myself still there more than two hours later scrolling through the “For You” feed of random people. I am now obsessed with and have followed the stream of a pet monkey who receives a ton of fan mail.
  • I bought my kid a new Nintendo Switch that he has been begging for since Christmas, then proceeded to “borrow” it all night and played Tetris 99 for over 3 hours until my hands were cramping and the battery died. I may have then bought another Switch the next day so I could have my own because TETRIS and who wants to share? (Thank you stimulus check!)
  • I actually said, “I’m so bored!” I honestly can’t remember the last time I uttered those words. Life generally keeps me so busy that boredom is not an option.
  • I got bored enough to fire up Fortnite on my switch and *tried* to play even though I had no idea what I was doing. Then my 8-year-old tried to teach me what to do and got embarrassed when I could’t hang. I think I’ll stick to Tetris…or maybe check out Animal Crossing.

I have actually spent some time doing things I’m not embarrassed about too. Some things I may even be a little bit proud of myself for doing – and finishing. I’m really great at starting projects, but not always so great at finishing them.

  • I started crocheting a “Quarantine Blanket” several weeks ago after the stay at home orders started and I finished it last night. It didn’t exactly turn out the way it was supposed to because I crocheted it way too tight to match the pattern and I ran out of one of my yarn colors a bit too soon. But, since the purpose was to use up yarn I already had, I can call it a success. I’m glad to finish it because I found another pattern I want to start on.
  • With the help of a tutorial I found on facebook, a bunch of old scrap material, and some leftover elastic (from back when I had a baby girl to sew cute things for), I sewed up some face masks for the family. Now that they are becoming mandatory to wear many places, I figured we should have some on hand.
  • I also completed a fun painting project. My friend posted about an online painting party she was hosting with some sample projects and I fell in love with one she posted of the Kansas City skyline. She put together kits with all the supplies needed. I missed the zoom party she hosted, but she included enough directions I could figure it out and I think it turned out really good!Painting of a heart with Kansas City skyline

There are a lot of other things I probably should be doing with my time, but it has actually been a lot of fun to just slow down and enjoy some silly time-waster type things.

So, what have you been up to?

Comments closed

School Closing Extension and a Stay-At-Home Easter

With last week’s orders from the Missouri Governor, schools are now closed through the end of the school year. I knew it was coming, but after the week we had last week it felt a bit like a punch to the gut. The novelty of e-learning at home has definitely worn off. It is becoming more and more of a struggle to get the kids up and doing their work every day.

I think the announcement also brought with it the reality that we are going to be stuck here at home a lot longer than we initially thought. It means our “postponed” sports seasons are now cancelled. It means no get-togethers with friends for the foreseeable future. It means no church. It means no enjoying the beautiful Spring weather riding roller coasters at Worlds of Fun. It means not getting to experience the end of the school year with their friends, which is honestly the best part. It means not exchanging year books and phone numbers and making plans to get together over the summer. It means that instead of being excited to stay home and sleep in over summer break, the days will just continue, the same as they are now.

I saw a shift after the announcement was made. It was physical, visible. Their shoulders slumped, eyes lowered. As much as they complain about going to school, this isolation and distancing from their peers is hard. They miss their friends. They miss the routine. Even my most optimistic child, who typically can make the best of any situation, is struggling to keep her head above the water of the depression pool at this point. It is so hard to watch and know there really is nothing I can do to help. I try to stay positive, but it is hard when I am struggling too.

We tried to make the best of Easter on Sunday. We colored Easter eggs with the cousins via Zoom Saturday night. The Easter Bunny delivered baskets of goodies and hid eggs for the kids to find when they woke up. We watched church services online, but it just isn’t the same as being in a church building filled with like-minded people singing and worshiping. We spent some time on a Zoom call with my Dad and Debie, and my siblings families. I cooked an actual meal (with the help of Evie). We had ham, potatoes, deviled eggs, and green beans. It would have been perfect had I remembered to buy some bread rolls at the store, and if my oldest would have actually come upstairs for dinner. He is definitely in the stage where family is not a priority. By the time we cleaned up after dinner I was wiped out and ended up taking a nap on the couch for a bit.

To be honest, I haven’t felt the greatest the last few days. After a bit of a “high” last week with the incredible sunshine and lots of exercise, I crashed. Friday and Saturday my stomach wasn’t feeling great and I started noticing my energy levels were way down. Saying you aren’t feeling well right now throws up all kinds of red flags, but my symptoms are not COVID-19 related, I swear. Though I’ve had no fever, I’m suspecting an infection. If things don’t get better soon, I’ll be calling my doctor, though a trip to the doctor is the last thing I want to do right now. I do, however, want to start feeling better and get my energy back up. It is hard to be peppy for everyone else when all I want to do is crawl in bed and sleep. I just have to make myself pick up the phone and call.

Comments closed

Current Mood

Nope.

I gotta be honest. Staying home is starting to get to me more than I thought it would. Surprisingly, the weekends (which are significantly less demanding), are harder than the weekdays. Weekdays require getting up, getting my work done, making sure the kids have what they need for their school work and sticking to some sort of regular routine, even if it is incredibly flexible. Then the weekend hits and there is nothing to compel me to get out of bed, get dressed, or do much of anything at all.

Don’t get me wrong, there is plenty to do. I just have absolutely no motivation. Knowing that we are at home for at least another three weeks leaves absolutely no sense of urgency to get things done. I mean, why do it today when I know I’ll be here to do it tomorrow, or the next day, or the next day?

Adding on to my general lack of motivation is that I let myself run out of my ADHD meds. I made a trip to the pharmacy last week to fill them and managed to leave my prescription at home and I haven’t gotten back out again. Not helpful. Without my meds my motivation to do things is even less than normal. The funny part is I lived most of my life without them and was just fine. Now that I know how much better I can function with them, I hate the days when I miss a dose. Yesterday, for instance, I barely moved off of the couch.

My husband looked at me this morning and asked, “What’s wrong?”

My response? “Nothing. Everything.”

More than anything, I think I just miss the ability to go somewhere when I want to. As much of a homebody as I am, I miss being able to just hop in the car and go. My daughter is definitely feeling it as well. She was nearly in tears when I told her I couldn’t take her with me to the grocery store. She is desperate to just get out somewhere, even if just to buy groceries.

Really the toughest part is trying to make sure everyone else in my house is doing okay, even when I am feeling moody and distant myself. Yesterday was a rough day all around. The kids are tired of being cooped up and are fighting. Everybody is over-reacting to pretty much everything. I feel like I have to be the peacekeeper all the time for my own sanity, even when I don’t have the energy to deal with it all. I know how ridiculous it is, but I feel like I’m failing when they are not happy. So right now? Yep, feeling like a huge failure in that department.

The weather the last few days hasn’t helped at all either. It turned cold and rainy, which brought an abrupt stop to our walks and trampoline time for a few days. It is a bit warmer today, so a walk with the dog is definitely on the priority list – after I make a trip to the pharmacy for my meds. The meds are definitely essential.

I’m trying to turn things around today a bit. I got up and showered, got dressed, cleaned the kitchen, and made pancakes for the family. I am determined to get some exercise and accomplish a few things around the house today that will hopefully lift my mood and get me in the right headspace before we begin the work/school week tomorrow. I’m determined not to let myself sink too low, but I’m admitting that it is a struggle right now.

1 Comment

Another Day of Distancing

At this point, do I even keep counting days? We’re on week three of being home, week two of “distance learning” for the kids. You would think we would have some sort of routine down by now, but it felt less “routine” today than it did last week.

The weekend was an absolute wash. I don’t think I accomplished a single thing except finishing the 5th season of the show I’ve been watching, eating everything in sight, and watching movies. I did go buy some groceries and even with the weirdness of gloves and masks everywhere I looked, it still felt good to do something that felt so normal. They even had most of the things I needed to buy, so that was pretty fantastic.

Monday came around a little too fast, but the start of a new week always feels good – like a fresh start. I got started on my day before the kids woke up. I fixed my tea, did a few work tasks, checked my email, printed off checklists and worksheets for school, and then I suddenly realized my daughter had a school project due that she hadn’t finished. Another thing I missed in the shuffle. Maybe by the time we go back to a regular schedule I’ll finally get it together. I’ll either get them more organized, or get myself more organized.

Today held another first in the name of social distancing – online therapy. One of my kids sees an amazing doctor a couple times a month to deal with anxiety and some other issues. It really seems to help and missing an appointment is just out of the question. Fortunately, the doctor is able to do appointments online during this time so we don’t have to miss out. The video wasn’t working correctly, but we at least got to talk, which of course is the important part. We’ve used so many different video conferencing apps over the last week and of course this is the one that didn’t work.

The best part of the day though, honestly, was that the sun was shining. When we stopped to eat lunch, we decided it had to be done outside. The sun was so bright that even at 68 degrees it felt hot outside. I cooled off quite a bit in the afternoon, but those 15 minutes I spent out in the sun at lunch seriously made my day.

boy eating lunch outside
Comments closed

I Don’t Even Know What Day It Is

The thing about everything shutting down is that keeping track of time becomes difficult. Despite my efforts to keep on a semi-regular schedule with work tasks and keep the kids on track for school, I still have to really think some days to figure out what day of the week it is. I had a super mom-fail moment this week when I forgot to get Zach up early enough for his 9:30 am Google Meet with one of his classes. With four days of distance learning almost under our belts, that is the only major miss for the week though.

Keeping on a schedule when you have nowhere to be is all new for us. I’ve had an occasional work from home day in the past, but it is usually due to having a sick kid at home, or a middle of the day appointment that I had to be at. I have never done this on a long-term basis, and certainly have not done it with three kids at home. I’m still mostly sticking to my regular work schedule and trying to keep my weekly tasks on the same daily schedule for the sake of routine. Instead of chats with co-workers and walks across the building for signatures, I have breaks for explaining math problems or going over sight words. Oddly, I feel my productivity most days is better than in the office. I’m saving about 45 minutes a day in drive time, yet I keep finding myself working well beyond my usual work hours because there is no rush to “get home” to the kids.

My biggest struggle time-wise seems to be what happens after work and school time is done. Everything just seems to go so much slower. There is no rush home, start dinner, get to activities part of the evening. It is more, “Ugh, I have to cook again? Is anybody even hungry?” I mean, we don’t eat out much anymore anyway, but when you have been cooped up in the house for two weeks, the idea of a meal out at a restaurant is pretty dang appealing. Getting around to dinner has been slower, and later (because we have nowhere to go), and well, pretty uninspired. I try to get out and walk/run the dog every day as long as it isn’t raining, but there is really no rush to do much of anything else. The rest of our evenings generally get wrapped up with an overabundance of screen time because I’m just out of energy to try to make them do anything else at that point.

I find myself staying up later and later at night. I should be reading or doing something productive, but instead I find myself binge watching multiple seasons of ridiculous teen dramas. Without the threat of the alarm clock going off at 5 a.m., there’s no reason not to just watch another episode…and another…until I can no longer hold my eyes open. Perhaps it is time to try my prescribed sleep meds again because even once I go to bed I toss and turn and don’t really sleep. I’m still setting an alarm to make sure I get up, but I pretty much wake up when Hubby leaves for work anyway so there is no need.

It really is interesting to see how we are all functioning. Honestly, the kids don’t seem that phased by the whole thing…yet. They are all kind of figuring out their own schedules. They are also staying up a little too late at night, and sleeping in probably a little too late in the mornings. Even Caleb, my early riser, is sleeping until 8:30-9:00 every morning (which I love because I still get a little quiet time to myself). They miss their friends, but they are finding ways to keep in touch. School work, even though they would prefer not to do it, is keeping them somewhat engaged and connected as well.

As for Hubby, he is still going to work every day. While I’m sure things have changed within his day-to-day work schedule, his routine is staying fairly the same. The only thing he is really missing is that his gym is now closed, so he doesn’t get his workout time in that he really enjoys. He’s doing what he can from home, but it just isn’t the same. I think it is also hard for him to understand how cooped up the rest of us are feeling. While I’m sure he would love to be working from home as well, he is the most extroverted of us all and I’m not sure he would handle it well for an extended time. He needs to go to work, to feel needed, and to be around other people – even if they are distancing and not staying in close proximity.

While keeping up with the days is hard, I do know that today is Friday. Sadly, the only thing that changes is that we can drop the work/school routine for a couple days. I’m hoping the weather stays nice enough that we can get outside, but a two day long Harry Potter marathon sounds pretty good as well.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger... 1 Comment