Sunday night Hubby and I took advantage of my Mom’s offer to babysit and went to see Harry Potter. We had a nice time getting out by ourselves for a few hours (and the movie was awesome!). We got home, put the kids to bed, and soon headed to bed ourselves. Just before I got to bed I suddenly felt sick and threw up. I’m guessing it was the buttery popcorn I had at the movie, but who knows.
Monday morning I still felt a bit queasy and without thinking I posted to Twitter and Facebook something about how it sucked to start out Monday morning with a queasy stomach. When I got to work a while later I had a bunch of replies suggesting I was pregnant. Which of course was the same thing Hubby asked me when I got sick. Uh, no.
So as the day went on I felt a little better and by lunchtime I felt pretty much back to normal. (One more argument for the popcorn). I felt fine the rest of the night so I just blew the whole thing off.
Then Monday night I had the dream. In the dream I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. I freaked out. I didn’t know what to tell Hubby or how in the heck we would handle another child right now. I woke up in a frantic state. Then I realized it was just a dream. My head was racing but my stomach was feeling a bit off again.
Then little thoughts started creeping in. I am a couple days late (which isn’t unusual for me even while on the pill) and certain areas have been rather tender for the last week or so and I’ve been having a bit of pain in the pelvic area (which also isn’t unusual for me). Dang it. I prayed for the strength to accept whatever plan God had for our family. Then I had to go get a test just to be sure.
So I took the test and got a big fat negative. After about half a second of sadness, I let out the biggest sigh of relief ever. After years and years of trying so hard to get pregnant, I was actually relieved not to be. That was kind of a strange, almost foreign, feeling for me. It actually surprised me that I was so happy about the result.
The best part of all of this, is that it confirmed exactly what I’ve been feeling since the day Evie was born. Our family is perfect just the way it is right now, just the four of us. Some day we may decide we’re ready for another baby – but today is not that day.