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In A Blink

I keep finding myself thinking back to when Zach was a baby. Looking back now, it seems like life was so simple then. My world completely revolved around him. There were no other distractions. There was plenty of time to sit and cuddle and get totally lost in his sweet little baby face.

With Caleb being baby number three, I feel like I so rarely get that time to just sit and enjoy his babyness. I feel like I blinked my eyes and BOOM! He’s three months old already. He’s growing and changing so fast.


The mommy guilt? Oh man, is it ever setting in. While I’m trying to savor every minute I can with Caleb, I feel like I’m totally ignoring the other two kids. I see the behaviors coming out and the begging for attention. It is impossible with the limited time we have together at home to give everyone all of the attention they need. The hardest part is when I am feeding the baby and cannot help the other two with what they are needing in that moment. Not to mention the husband who has been feeling totally neglected since the baby arrived.

On top of trying to juggle the new baby while sticking as close as possible to our normal routine, I’m trying to get my little photography business rolling again. Just as it was gaining momentum I had to take a break (due to being massively pregnant)…that turned into about 6 months. Winter would have been slow anyway, but not taking on clients for 6 months was kind of a killer.  What that time did give me though, was a lot of time to think through what I am doing and make some changes. I’m now getting a bit of a do-over, or fresh start, and hope to make things better this time around. (Speaking of which, have you seen my gorgeous new logo?) This all takes time though, so I find myself having to choose between the business I want to grow, my family, and sleep. Guess which one loses out?


If you guessed sleep, you would be correct. Fortunately, once I do get to bed I can actually sleep. I just don’t get enough hours in. Caleb is still sleeping through the night, which is a true blessing. He usually snoozes off and on after about 8:00, zonks out completely around 10:00 or 11:00, and then sleeps solid until at least 6:00, sometimes later. Then he nurses and goes right back to sleep. I can deal with that. It does make it hard for me to get up though, because after that 6am nursing session I like to snuggle in bed with him instead of getting up and starting my day.

So, let’s get back to why I originally started this blog post and talk about how awesome my sweet baby Caleb is, shall we?


Caleb turned 3 months old on Saturday and celebrated this amazing feat by rolling over for the first time. He had been working on it for several days with no success. Saturday night he was a little restless so I put him down in the floor on a blanket and sat down to play with him for a bit. He kept trying to twist his body and finally, after several attempts, he made it all the way over from his back to his tummy. After I helped get his arm out from underneath him, he was quite proud of himself and had a huge smile on his face. I cheered and even clapped for him until I realized that I could no longer leave him on the bed by himself.


He has also discovered that he has hands and feet that he can control. He found his hands a while ago, but the feet are a pretty new discovery. Whenever he sits up in the Bumbo or another chair, he will stick his feet up in the air and stare as he wiggles them around.


Over the last couple of days he has also discovered that he has a thumb that moves independently from the rest of his hand. And that he can stick said thumb in his mouth and suck on it. He has taken a pacifier from day one, but suddenly he is spitting it out in favor of the thumb. I’ve never had a thumb sucker before and I’m not sure whether I want to try to stop it now or have to deal with breaking the habit later. He’s pretty intent on having it in his mouth right now. He has sucked that thumb so much today that the tip of it is bright red. I guess he had to throw something new at me though, seeing as he’s nearly perfect in every other way.

Yep, still at it! He likes the thumb.


Caleb’s Birth Story – Part 1

I woke up Sunday morning ready for a lazy day. I had convinced Evie to stay home with me while the boys went to church because the doctor had put me on bed rest for the weekend. I promised her a movie and some snuggle time, so we settled into Daddy’s big recliner with our blankets. “Annie” was her movie choice for the day, as it often is when it is just the two of us.

Soon after we started the movie, I realized that I was having some pretty regular contractions. They had been off and on through most of the weekend so I wasn’t surprised, but they were getting a little closer together. I decided maybe I should start keeping track and started timing. 10 minutes apart. I debated whether to call Hubby and have him come home from church, but I decided to wait a little longer and see what happened. Instead I texted my mom so she would be prepared in case I needed her to come quickly. Evie and I snuggled through the rest of the movie while I continued timing.

The contractions were fluctuating just a little, but on average continued to be about 10 minutes apart. When our movie was done, I decided I better go take a shower – just in case. I was getting a little nervous and was pretty sure that we would be meeting the newest member of our family by the end of the day.

Evie and I had a light lunch and then headed back the the chair for more cuddle time. Shortly after that, Hubby and Zach returned from church. I was very happy that they were home. Evie ran off to play with her brother. I stretched out on the love seat and was able to get in a much needed nap.

When I woke up I was a little frustrated because it seemed like my contractions had really slowed back down. It wasn’t long before they were back though, and even stronger than before. I talked to my mom and decided that she should go ahead and come over to the house since she was designated to watch the big kids when it was time to go. She was waiting for my brother to pick his kids up from her house and then she would head over.

I started trying to gather my last minute things, double checking my bag, and making sure the kids had something to entertain them while they waited at the hospital. I had Hubby make the kids some dinner while I tried to finish packing. The contractions were coming much closer together and were so much more intense that I had to sit each time one started.

My mom finally arrived and I decided it was time to page the doctor. I talked to the kids and told them what was happening and that Grandma would be bringing them to the hospital to meet their baby brother in a little bit.

We waited for what seemed like forever for the doctor to call back. The contractions were getting closer and closer together. When they were under five minutes apart, I decided we were just going to go to the hospital anyway. I wasn’t going to wait any longer for the doctor to call. I gave the kids hugs and kisses and Hubby and I headed out the door.

When we arrived at the hospital, just before 8:00 pm, my contractions were only about two minutes apart.


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There’s something about pregnancy that seems to give me a creative block. I’m not sure if it is simply my body just being too tired to care or what, but during my last two pregnancies, I’ve been blocked. My ability to write, or create anything really, just seems to disappear.

Fortunately, after the babies are out, it all comes back. Right now my head is churning with all of the things I want to write, create, and photograph. There is so much going on up there that I can’t decide where to start. Perhaps the best place to start is to take a nap so I can stay awake long enough to complete a thought.

One thing that needs to be a priority, is the design of this blog. For some reason, I suddenly hate the layout and look of the whole thing. My writing and frequency has changed a lot over the last couple of years and I feel like it is time to change things up a bit.  So, as soon as I can find the time to sit down and think, there will definitely be some changes.  A change in design tends to encourage me to write more as well, and I’m told that people actually do like to read what I write so I suppose that’s a good thing.

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38 Weeks

38 weeks

The waiting is indeed the hardest part. Well, that and trying to keep this ginormous belly covered since I’ve outgrown nearly all the maternity shirts I own now.

After my 36 week sonogram, my doctor gave me an induction date of February 15th – as in tomorrow. I was quite pleased with that date and very much looking forward to finally meeting this little guy growing in my belly. Considering he was already measuring at about 8 pounds, I thought two more weeks of growth was more than enough. Then I went in for my 37 week checkup and was told that she looked at the dates wrong. There was no way she would induce me before 39 weeks, and the induction date was pushed back to the 22nd. Apparently it is mandated by some hospital regulation and is non-negotiable unless there is a serious medical issue. Ugh. So I wait.

I feel like he will come before the 22nd on his own, but I also thought Zach would be early and he came 4 days late. I am so ready to have this baby that I pray daily for contractions. They come off and on, but nothing steady enough to actually believe I’m in labor.

Some serious nesting has kicked in at home and everything is ready to welcome the little guy home. There are more clothes, blankets, and burp rags than any baby could ever need, plus a healthy supply of diapers, wipes, and all that goes along with a new baby. His big brother and sister are so excited they can barely stand it. They want this baby to come just as much as I do.

I am as caught up at work as I’ll probably ever be. There is always more that can be done, but absolutely nothing pressing. I can’t believe how hard I have worked the last few weeks to get it that way, but it feels pretty great to finally be there. I can leave knowing that it won’t be a huge burden on anyone else while I’m gone.

My hospital bag is packed and in my car. I’m even toting my camera with me to work every day “just in case” something starts happening. Maybe I’m a little too prepared.

I’m tempted to Google “how to induce labor” but am almost scared at the results I would get. Although, aside from chugging castor oil, I’d be up for just about anything right now. Got any suggestions? Lay them on me.

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32 Weeks and Counting


A friend suggested the other day that I actually write something on this blog, so here I am attempting to write. It has been so long since I’ve actually written anything that I’m not really sure where to start, which is why I’ve been sitting here staring at a blank screen for nearly an hour now.

I guess the easiest place to start is with baby news. I’m 32 weeks along and so ready to be done being pregnant. Thanks to the fact that Hubby and I seem to make ginormous babies, I’ve had several sonograms now. At the last check, he was measuring about 2 1/2 weeks ahead of due date based on his size. I’ll have another sono at 36 weeks and then most likely will schedule an early evacuation for the little guy. After two 9 pound babies, I’m a little scared of just how big this one will be. Of course, the kicks I’m getting in the ribs really aren’t helping that fear at all. Not only is he big, he’s a strong little guy.

While I’m ready to be done with the whole pregnancy thing, I’m not so sure I’m ready to be the mother of a newborn again. Round the clock feedings, diapers, no sleep – just the thought of all that makes me tired. However, once he’s here, I’m sure none of that will bother me and I’ll be more than happy to snuggle up and enjoy my baby boy. I just can’t believe how close it is getting.

The kids are getting really excited to meet their little brother. Evie is obsessed with asking how much longer it is until the baby comes out. She knows he will be here in February, so she asks over and over again when February will get here. Along with her excitement (and possibly some anxiety) over the baby’s arrival, we have also reached a stage of whining and crying and screaming that is completely unbearable. Knowing her emotions are going haywire has not given me any more patience, unfortunately.

Zach is getting anxious as well, but he shows it in a much more endearing way. He has become very loving and gives me lots of extra hugs. He also loves to rub my belly, which I think is the sweetest thing ever. He’s been able to feel the baby move several times now and thinks that is really cool.

And now I’ve got to get to bed, but hopefully I’ll manage to write more later this week. Next up – the holidays and some big plans for my photography business!

***Photo above was taken around Thanksgiving and is quite possibly my favorite photo of them together I’ve ever taken!

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I’m getting ridiculously anxious for my ultrasound next week (Monday, 3:00!). I absolutely can not wait to find out whether this baby is a he or a she. We’re pretty settled on both a girl and a boy name already, which is kind of amazing considering how long (and how many disagreements) it took us the first time around.

I’m just so ready to start preparing things. I’ve got the nesting bug in a serious way right now, I just don’t have the energy or the time to do the work required. I would just really like to know whether to start pulling out the purple girl stuff or the blue boy stuff (sorry, but kid #3 gets the hand-me-downs!). Plus, whichever I don’t need? I can finally get rid of FOR GOOD. We are definitely done after this one and my basement could use a good cleaning out!

So little one dancing around in my belly – this is your warning. Do not cross your legs on Monday or I’ll be poking you until you uncross them!

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