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Tag: health

Would you like some cheese with that?

This is my third re-write of this post because no matter how I put the words down, it just feels like I’m whining. I guess I kind of am, but I just have to get it out somewhere, you know?

I’m so tired, you guys. The baby isn’t sleeping well. The 4-year-old isn’t sleeping well. Certain other members of my household are constantly on edge. I wake up in the morning just as tired as I was when I went to bed the night before. I am pretty much walking around in a constant state of exhaustion.

I can’t get anything done at home because when I actually have a few minutes of free time? That’s when the baby wants to nurse or be held and I can’t deny him that. I get so little time with him as it is. The house is a mess. My checkbook is a mess. There is laundry everywhere that needs to be either folded or put away. I have to-do lists a mile long and yet I can’t seem to get anything crossed off.

On top of that, Caleb and I have both had a cold for the last couple weeks that just will not go away. I know that is contributing to my sluggish state, but I’m too stubborn (and cheap) to actually go to the doctor.

I have slipped back into my full-on Diet Coke addiction because if I’m not constantly pumping caffeine into my body I just can’t stay awake. I know it is horrible for me, but I don’t do coffee and when I drink tea I want to pump it full of sugar. I get enough sugar from my chocolate stash that I also use to keep myself awake. I can feel myself dragging and know this won’t fix it, but it is my go-to when there isn’t time to take care of my body the right way.

I keep telling myself that this time will pass. It will get better. When he’s older it will be easier. The first year with every baby has been hard. This one just happens to be the hardest, because I also have two other kids that depend on me. Everybody needs Mom – all at the same time – and there isn’t enough of me to go around.

Mostly, I just feel like I’m letting everybody down – including myself. I can’t be everything. I can’t do everything. I want to be the perfect mom, the perfect wife, the perfect employee, the perfect photographer, the perfect everything, but right now I feel like I’m hitting the bottom of the scale in all areas.


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There’s nothing quite as fun as having your doctor called out to deliver a baby just as your appointment has finally started. Well, except when you are sitting in a cold room with no pants on and a thin sheet draped over your legs. That definitely makes it more fun – not!

So, now you know how my morning went. Seriously, the fun never ends around here!

Oh, but wait! There’s more!

While I was waiting for my doc to return, they went ahead and put me in the sono room where it was determined that I do indeed have another ovarian cyst. I pretty much knew that was the case. This isn’t my first go-round. I had two massive cysts removed when I was 19, and another fairly large one last September.  This time around it isn’t as large, but instead I have a cluster of smaller cysts.

After the sono, I had to wait again to talk to my doctor.  When she finally came to the room, she told me that this won’t require surgery (whew!), and that we can treat it by a change in medication.  I go back in three months for another sono to check everything out.  Hopefully, that will be the end of it.

I finally left the doctor’s office at 12:40, almost 3 1/2 hours after my original appointment time.

It’s a good thing that I really love my doctor, otherwise I would have been a bit annoyed.

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Eating Organic

organic fruit and vegetables
I’m not sure when it started exactly. It has been in the back of my mind for years, but only recently it seems that it is being thrown at me from every direction. I’ve read magazine articles, blogs, stared at recipes, and always am left wondering, “How do they do it?” I’ve tried to diet and failed miserably, over and over again. Shortly after Zach was born, Hubby and I both did Weight Watchers and lost the pounds eating low-fat or no-fat, sugar free, chemical filled crap. Then, after depriving ourselves for so long, we started eating regular food again and put those pounds right back on. Not exactly the goal we had in mind.

So these things have been rattling around in my head for a while. Some posts by Cagey got me thinking about food dyes and their effects on behavior. I even ordered some books (which I have yet to find the time to read) to read up on this topic.  Then there was the whole Food Revelation thing that convinced me my kids will be taking their lunches to school instead of buying the over-priced, processed school lunches.  Then Andreanna started writing about her Primal lifestyle and posted some amazing progress photos.  And then one night when I found myself home alone I watched Food, Inc. on Netflix.  The next morning, I opened up my inbox to find a Groupon opportunity for a discounted box of fruits/veggies from Fresh Connect, a local delivery service for organic and locally grown produce, meat, and dairy.

The wheels started turning.

I’ve known for a long time that I wanted to eat healthier foods.  I’ve wanted to switch to locally grown produce.  I’ve wanted to cut the junk out of my diet and eat real foods.  But there’s always been something holding me back – time, money, convenience.  Those are the big ones.  We’re a busy family, with two parents who work outside of the home full-time.  Our normal grocery shopping consists of a huge trip about once a month to stock up the freezer and a few quick runs for milk, bread, and other perishables in between.  I’ve never been able to carve out the time to go to a local farmer’s market, mainly because it would require me getting up way too early on a Saturday morning to go.  We spend a lot of money on food, and the thought of spending even more to buy organic at the grocery store makes me want to cling to my debit card.  And then there’s the convenience factor.  We want quick meals.  We don’t want to spend hours in the kitchen.  Plus, we have very impatient kids who want food on the table the minute we walk in the door after a long day at day care.

There’s always an excuse.

You know what though?  I’m tired of the excuses.  I finally decided that I’m going to throw all the excuses out and just do it.  I brought it up to Hubby and told him about Fresh Connect and how I’d like to start getting some of our produce and maybe meat from them.  I expected him to say I was being ridiculous, but he didn’t.  He balked a little at the prices, but eventually agreed that it was a good idea to try it out.  I purchased the Groupon for our first box of fruit/veggies.  During my next trip to the grocery store, I picked up locally farmed, hormone-free, milk for my daughter (she’s the only milk drinker of the family).

We received our first Fresh Connect box Friday night full of delicious fruits and veggies – plenty to last us at least a week or two.  There were a lot of items that I just don’t ever buy at the store.  I’m looking forward to getting creative in the kitchen and finding ways to use them.  My kids were impressed when they saw the carrots with the green part still attached.  Evie devoured the grapes within minutes of us opening the box.  We started planning meals for the week based on fresh vegetables, not the boxes residing in our freezer.  We picked up a few more items that we would need at the grocery store to round out our menu, some of it organic, some of it not.

I’m not at all ready for a Primal diet and I know there will still be a lot of non-organic items in our kitchen, but I like the fact that we’re starting to make a change.  My children seem to think they cannot survive without bologna and cheese sandwiches, but at least I can start pairing it with carrots and celery or an apple instead of chips.

The cost may still be a bit prohibitive for us, especially through the winter months, but I’m really hoping we can make this work.  Since I started running in preparation for the Race for the Cure I’ve put a lot more thought into what I’m putting into my body.  I’m drinking a lot more water.  I’m snacking on nuts, veggies, and cheese instead of chocolate.  I’m bringing my lunch to work instead of going through the McDonald’s drive-thru.  This is the next logical step and I finally feel like I’m ready for the challenge.

*photo by val’s photos on flickr


Consider the Other Ball Dropped

So the title of my Wednesday night post became eerily appropriate just a few hours later.  I awoke Thursday morning to my phone ringing.  On the other end was my dad’s wife saying that they were at the hospital and that my dad had a mild heart attack that morning.  By that time he was stable and doing fine, but there were lots of tests yet to be run on him.

As the day went on and more reports came in, it was determined that he did not actually have a heart attack, but that he did have some inflammation and infection around his heart that was causing part of it not to work properly.  I’m not really sure what all of that means, but it most definitely sounds better than a heart attack at his age.

My first reaction when I got the news was to get to the hospital as quickly as possible.  Then I looked outside and realized that wasn’t going to be possible.  The roads were covered in ice and according to the news and radio reports no one was getting anywhere very quickly in the city.  On top of that, Zachary was still sick so I decided to stay home and wait by my phone instead of jumping in the car.

As it turns out, I made the right choice because by evening I wasn’t feeling so well myself.  Apparently Zach’s illness was finally passed on to me after a week of him coughing and sneezing in my face.

On top of feeling quite crappy myself, Zach got extremely clingy and whiny last night.  I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with him other than knowing that he didn’t get a nap so I was quite frustrated with all the whining.  Nothing seemed to make him happy.  He wanted a drink, then he didn’t want a drink.  He wanted his blanket, then he didn’t want his blanket.  He wanted to be held, then he didn’t want to be held.  Rinse, repeat, all night long. By about 3:00 a.m. he was whining and moaning so much that I finally just got up with him.

I finally ended up propping myself up on a pile of pillows and sitting up in the bed for the rest of the night with him lying on my shoulder.  Shortly after that I figured out what the problem was.  He had finally calmed down enough to talk to me and told me that there was water in his ear.  Suddenly it all made sense.  The boy now has an ear infection.  I think he finally relaxed and fell back asleep around 5:00 and I followed shortly after.  When my alarm went off at 6:20 I wanted to kill it.   I let myself hit the snooze button for about another hour before getting out of bed.  When I finally made it up and to the bathroom the first thing I noticed was a bunch of icky ear drainage on the shoulder of my shirt where Zach had been sleeping.

I was dialing the doctor’s office as soon as they opened at 8:30 and was able to get Zach an appointment to see the nurse practitioner.   The consensus was that he most likely has the flu, although it is too late in the cycle now to medicate it so they didn’t bother with the flu test.  I guess I should have pushed a bit harder for them to test him on Monday when they told me it was most likely just a virus that would pass in a few days.  All of the congestion apparently pushed the crud into his ears and caused the nasty ear infection.  Fortunately, it is only one ear (for now) and the other one was still completely clear.  At least I know that the tubes are working because there is all kinds of stuff draining from the infected ear.

After the doctor’s office, I took Zach home, gave him some Motrin for the pain and the first dose of his antibiotic ear drops, and had to leave him with Granny and Papa so I could get to work.  I’ve hardly worked at all this week and I’m feeling terrible about that.  At least I was fairly caught up at the end of last week so I’m not really behind at all.  I just didn’t get ahead of things like I had planned on doing this week.

At this point, I am just so done with this week.  I want it to end so I can move on to better times.  We have no big plans for the weekend other than to enjoy visiting with the in-laws.  Personally, I plan to sleep in as long as possible for the next two days and try to make up for all of the sleep that I’ve missed out on all week.

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